Hurt People Hurt People

There are things that happen in this life that we learn to handle (or not handle) in various ways. Depending on our life’s structure, how we grew up, the things that we were taught and the patterns that we developed as life progresses; we try to our best to live in this world. I have met some mean people throughout my life time, some bullies, some people who were the worst of the worst and my first thought is, What Happened To Them?  Yes, I know the scripture that we are born into to sin, and I realize that we have choices.  I also realize that there are cycles that continue, there are unbelievable pains that repeat themselves throughout generations.  I have seen the goodness of God shine through some, including myself and change them back to what He originally created them to be. Although it is difficult to get along with all people and continue even after they hurt you, prayer never fails.  I know young man, with an outstanding heart.  He has always been good. Over the past 7 – 8 years, he has changed.  He has allowed certain things, people and vices into his life that he would have never done in the past.  It has been heart breaking to see.  While he agrees that he needs help, while he is in his current state, he has his moments of causing excruciating pain in the lives of those around him.  The hurt that began as a quiet storm on the inside of him is now explosive and it screams, out loud to those closest to him.  He still has wonderful moments that will make you cry but the reality of his life right now is that he is hurting.  He really does need help.  He needs new friends because the ones that he has selected for this phase of his life are also broken and mean him no good.  Prayer is amazing. God does hear our hearts and encourages us to pray without cease.  The friends and family that have remained true to this young man; whose to say how long they will stay around for the abuse, for the hard part, for the pruning.  Who knows, if they will continue to pray and believe because it has been a long stretch of pain.  Some of his friends even those who profess to be close to him, take their role in allowing the hurt to continue in his life.   The do and say things that only bring more pain.  They give him things that he really doesn’t need for the sake of making their own lives comfortable.  I would say that is not a friend  nor is it love and it will not last. When a person is down – it is not the time to be passive, to feed into lies, to give them more of what they don’t need if you really want them to be around for the long haul.  Hopefully as they heal they will begin to see that truth as well. This type of person becomes heart broken when the very thing that they did for comforting themselves back fires.  The young man. He has a choice.  He doesn’t have to give in.   We all go through weak moments  – times when the thing that we want to do, we don’t do and the things that we don’t want to do, we end up doing. Hold on.

If I could speak to this young man today, I would tell him that life goes on, that he is valuable and needed in this world.  That he does not have to continue in the patch and rut that he is in.  I would tell him that no one is exempt from pain, from hardships and the trials of this world and that he is not alone.  I would assure him that someone is praying for him and that the people that mean him no good, mean him no good … even if in his current state – they appear to be good. I would tell him to pray for himself, love himself, encourage himself, to hold on because I see a cloud and it looks like the rain of answered prayers coming.  I would tell him to hold onto hope.  If there is anything good, peaceful beautiful that he can remember to think on those things while the change is occuring.  I would tell him that there are going to be people and things that he will eventually let go of as their season of being in his life is over. I would tell him that I am praying for his recovery, for his future, for his heart, for him and that I have an assurance that it WILL be alright.  I am praying for the hurt and pain to be broken as well as every other chain that appears to have him bound.  I am praying that whatever God destined for him will manifest itself in his life immediately.  I would tell him to chose a different path, and the right people will come along (strong role models, friends and loved ones) and one day if he decides to look back at the road traveled; he will see the beauty that he has and is receiving for the dried out ashes that have surrounded him. Hold on, change is coming!

Make a decision about those you are lashing out at.  Yes, hurt people, usually hurt people. Decide to walk away, to gather yourself, to get some air.  There are somethings and some people who do not understand forgiveness at its simplest core so the words you speak out of your pain today can find a way to linger on for years to come.  Even in your stage of pain, you can choose NOT to allow your words to be spoken in a manner that only brings pain, bitterness and broken esteem.  You can stop repeating the same cycle that was given to you. Choose today and allow yourself time to heal. Allow yourself time to decide what and who you really are and want – begin to work on that as you work on yourself and God works out your restoration.  I believe in you and I know that it will get better.  You only need to take one step at a time.  The old saying that by and inch it is a cinch and by the yard is hard . . . rings true.  Don’t try to attack the problems and circumstances all at once, little by little is how you will make it and I still believe that you can.

Quiet By Nature


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